Florida Enacts Climate Resiliency Plan That Is 100% Free Of “Left-Wing Stuff”

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The Florida legislature has passed a sweeping $270 million climate resiliency plan that will fund 76 projects that will improve drainage, raise sea walls, and take other steps to fight flooding in the state, according to Yahoo! News. The projects include new pump stations, storm water sewers, sea walls, canal bank improvements, the elevation of fire stations, and other steps to cope with the increased risk of flooding.

At a press conference, Governor Ron DeSantis said, “We’re a low-lying state, we’re a storm-prone state, and we’re a flood-prone state. And so we worked with the Legislature to say, ‘OK how are we going to address this in a way that’s going to protect Florida’s communities, protect our economic livelihood and make sure we’re doing what we need to do.’”

In his remarks, the Supreme Leader of the Sunshine State denounced the use of the term “global warming” because he said it is a “pretext to do a bunch of left wing things.” He didn’t specify which left-wing things he was referring to, but his record while in office makes it clear he is intent on following in the footsteps of his hero, Donald Trump. DeSantis is positioning himself for a presidential campaign in 2024, if his mentor is kind enough to stand aside and allow him to run.

Asked by a reporter about global warming, the Governor said, “What I’ve found is, when people start talking about things like global warming, they typically use that as a pretext to do a bunch of left-wing things that they would want to do anyways. And so we’re not doing any left-wing stuff,” which apparently includes restrictions on energy production that might raise gas prices. DeSantis said the state’s growing population made it more vulnerable to flooding from hurricanes and other causes, and that it was simply common sense to take steps to make Florida more resilient.

“I just think that’s the right thing to do regardless. But be very careful of people trying to smuggle in their ideology; they say support our coastline or they say they support our water or our environment. And maybe they do, but they’re also trying to do a lot of other things.”

If you are looking for a list of commie pinko things a responsible government might take to actually address the challenge of a warming planet, you need look no further than Oslo, Norway, which has a plan to reduce carbon emissions 95% by 2030. DeSantis has no plan to reduce carbon emissions in his state by one iota. That is the difference between being proactive and reactive. DeSantis apparently does not have the mental acuity necessary to ask why Florida is a storm-prone state or a flood-prone state. Isn’t that dereliction of duty and a disservice to the citizens of the state?

Shawn Hamilton, secretary of the Florida Department of Environmental Protection, called the plan “a monumental step to prepare our state for the effects of sea-level rise. This plan will enhance our efforts to protect our inland waterways, coastlines, shores, and coral reefs which will serve as invaluable natural defenses to sea level rise,” he said, without bothering to consider why sea levels are rising in the first place. Way to suck up to the boss, there, Shawn! And great job with that plan to dump toxic wastewater into Tampa Bay. That was a brilliant example of responsible leadership.

Instead of trying to understand the problem, Florida will spend tens of millions of dollars a year on local flood control projects, establish a research center at the University of South Florida, conduct a statewide flood risk assessment, and prepare a 3-year sea level rise plan. That ought to do it. The seas wouldn’t dare rise any further or faster in the face of such vigorous programs.

At the present time, ocean levels in many parts of the state are rising as much as an inch every 8 years. But not to worry. Ron DeSantis has a plan and he intends to ride that plan — ignore science — all the way into the White House. No wonder so many white, right-thinking, gun-toting Floridians love their governor. This plan is like adding sprinklers to a building while storing open containers of gasoline in the basement. Welcome to the great state of Flori-duh!

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Steve Hanley

Steve writes about the interface between technology and sustainability from his home in Florida or anywhere else The Force may lead him. He is proud to be "woke" and doesn't really give a damn why the glass broke. He believes passionately in what Socrates said 3000 years ago: "The secret to change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old but on building the new."

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