Are E-Bikes Urban Time Machines?
Sometimes, I like to think about what a prehistoric human would think about modern technology. In a time when walking was the norm, and nobody was even riding horses, there was a hard limit on how far you could go. When deciding where to set up camp, people from those days had to find a spot that’s both near water, near a source of food (be it hunting and gathering or early agriculture), and relatively safe from large predators and other humans who might want to kill them.
The shifting of the seasons must’ve sucked a bit, though. A place that’s comfortable in the summer would likely often freeze you to death in the winter. But places that were comfortable in the winter could often mean dying in the heat when summer came. So, many early humans did what many modern Canadians with RVs do: travel between the nice spots and be in the right place at the right time.
I imagine myself rolling down a game trail on my trusty e-bike and toward one of my ancestor’s camp. Assuming they didn’t hurl a javelin through my chest, I’d get the opportunity to show them something that would probably appear to be godlike power. Instead of only being able to go maybe 10–15 miles in a day going between winter and summer camps, someone on an e-bike could go 50–100 miles, and do it carrying fresh meat! To people from those days, a bike is almost like a time machine, allowing days of grueling travel to happen in mere hours.
But, then I remember that I’d have no idea how to help them construct their own, and I’d probably be lost if my solar panels gave out. Plus, who wants to mess with the spacetime continuum and possibly destroy the future by giving ancient people e-bikes? It would make an interesting story, but not something you’d want to fool around with in the real world. Doc Brown taught me as a kid that you can’t mess around with that stuff, or you could end up with Biff in charge of everything (oh, crap, we kind of did that).
But, thinking about it a little more, another thing became clear: that you don’t have to be a caveman (or cave woman, non-binary cave-dweller, etc.) to experience the magic of e-bike time travel. Today, in the depressing urban jungles we’ve created for ourselves, we can benefit just as much from it, and perhaps more importantly, there’s probably somebody who can fix it when it breaks!
E-Bike Time Travel Method #1: Time is Distance
When you swing a leg over an e-bike, you’re not only choosing a method of travel. You’re choosing how to use your time that day!
Sure, cars are a lot faster, but that’s only true on paper when you run into traffic. When you ride in a car during terrible traffic, you find yourself spending a lot more time sitting still or barely crawling forward than you’d like. But, if you want to be extra frustrated, you can watch pedestrians, cyclists, and sometimes motorcycle riders zipping by. When you’re the one cutting through traffic like a hot knife through butter, you get extra time to do other things.
Walking is great, and so is walking to transit stops, but once again, time can be your enemy. Unless you’re some kind of freakishly fast power walker, trying to walk means you’re limited in how far you can go for food, water, jobs, and — yes, we’re just like our ancestors who hunted and gathered. You need to be close to the goods, right? Having more access to food, jobs, restaurants and entertainment, potential mates, and other things rocks!
A bike extends your radius of freedom each day, and saves you heaps of time. Even transit often can’t compete due to schedules and lines.
Time Travel Method #2: Lifespan
Sometimes, I talk to people about the possibility that Hitler got away. After all, skull fragments thought to be his probably weren’t, there were tunnels that went to the airport, and lots of famous Nazis got away and were caught in South America. But the conversation usually ends this way: “Well, the piece of shit is dead now either way.” Nobody lives to be 135 years old.
We’d all love to see the far future, but the limited time we all get in this mortal experience limits how far forward in time we can travel. Fortunately, e-bikes give you a hack you can use to get a few more years down the temporal highway: health. By getting exercise regularly, you can live longer (on average, of course — no guarantees!). Bikes give you the opportunity to exercise, but you have to save some energy for the ride home. E-bikes allow you to completely poop yourself out, and then throttle home, getting even better cardiovascular exercise.
Time Travel Method #3: The Clean Air Our Ancestors Enjoyed
Air quality definitely wasn’t perfect 10,000+ years ago. There were wildfires, volcanoes, and other things that could foul the air up. But there weren’t cars and trucks producing exhaust, power plants making soot, or other environmental problems. The air was cleaner back in the day, and (assuming you were the half of people who didn’t die as an infant) you’d probably have better lung health.
We obviously don’t want to go back to those days. Doctors were generally unhelpful until the early 20th century, and toilet paper wasn’t put on rolls until 1895! However, we can get a taste of that clean air by not contributing to the pollution. Cutting back on climate change can also mean we don’t accelerate things like wildland fires, making for more clean air.
Final Thoughts
In essence, e-bikes act like the Swiss Army Knife of time machines. They give us back hours of our day, allowing us to outmaneuver traffic, enjoy healthier lifestyles, contribute to environmental sustainability, and enhance important social interactions. They don’t just transport us across space; they transport us through time, making the most of every moment (quality AND quantity!).
In a world where time is often our most precious commodity, e-bikes are not just a mode of transport. They’re a tool for reclaiming and redefining how we live our lives.
Featured image by Jennifer Sensiba.
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